This may help: https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ptf/dhamma/sacca/sacca4/samma-vaca/index.html
IMO, if you're not a monk, you should be accepting of relationships, including sex as part of the relationship.Relationships, especially marriage are extremely hard and in fact test your internal resources more than life in a monastery can ever do. Having children is the best thing ever for your spiritual development. You think you're a calm and patient person? Wait until you are sleep-deprived for several months with an equally bad-tempered partner and have to juggle 15 things all on the verge of breakdown.Some traditions like Zen are accepting of marriage even for monks. But ultimately, everyone makes the decision for themselves.As for flings and one-night stands, I personally don't see anything wrong with them so long as they are done mindful of not causing any harm to yourself and others. But often, such things are itches that are scratched and then start to itch even more. People can get lost pursuing loveless affairs because relationships are too hard and require sacrifices.
This did shake something. Demanding relationships is something which I am not very comfortable taking on, at the same time I have the conditioning to judge myself and others for meaningless sex and the likes. My craving for physical affection, along with physically and mentally demanding career ambitions do not help either.As long as meditating for a fixed amount of day is concerned, it is not very troublesome, once one has created a routine. But keeping equanimity and awareness in daily life, which is unpredictable and without any breaks is the key. It is a LOT of work, which somehow I have knowingly ignored for a few months now. Caused me suffering too.
Quote from: Matthew on May 23, 2019, 11:12:00 PMThis may help: https://www.accesstoinsight.org/ptf/dhamma/sacca/sacca4/samma-vaca/index.htmlI went through this a few times. I have come to realize that following this is really very difficult(or so it seems from where I am at present).At the same time, it does point in the direction I need to move. Thus, it did help.Thank you, Matthew. How are you?
I will chime in whenever I see some violation of guidelines.Hope Mathew feels better soon.