Author Topic: Seeking advice on meditation and unpleasant feelings  (Read 956 times)

TheMichelle

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Seeking advice on meditation and unpleasant feelings
« on: April 02, 2015, 04:28:28 PM »
Hello everyone,

I signed up on this forum in October, after having started to feel anxiety. It happened after an intense summer where I didn't stop to rest, I used to drink and smoke and party everyday and by the end of the summer - August/September - I started to feel something that I had never felt before, at least not like that, anxiety. I didn't know what was it at the time, I suddenly started felt like my brain couldn't stop thinking about random things, mostly about death. I couldn't stop thinking that everyone I know and me are going to die, and I started asking myself what was the point of all of this. I mean, I've always known that and I've always been ok with that my whole life. In fact, I had a really happy childhood and a family and friends that I love, so it didn't make any sense to me that I could be so sad or so anxious about everything. I always considered myself a really happy person and it's like suddenly I stopped feeling like that. And I got so scared just by thinking that all those parties and alcohol abuse could have damaged my brain and I could have some kind of mental disease. I couldn't sleep at night, I couldn't eat. I didn't know what to do. I went to the doctor and they told me to take xanax for 5 weeks and to try to exercise, because it would be good for anxiety. I was decided to get better so I started taking xanax and I promised myself that I would meditate everyday, and I did. I got back to university and to work and in December I was feeling a lot better. In the beginning of December I stopped taking xanax and kept meditating, and I felt like I was cured. But it was like something inside me wasn't the same anymore, I still had those fears that I started having in September, I just had found a way to calm myself down. I stopped meditating in January because I believed I didn't need it anymore.
Then in February I started having 2 jobs and university at night. Everytime I got home at night I always felt really tired and slept like a baby. I quit my second job a week ago because I needed more time for university and to rest more. And this week I was at work and I started feeling really tired, I had been feeling like that for some days but that day I felt like I was going to faint. And because I was scared of what could happen to me, I started feeling anxious and decided to leave.

And now I start to feel anxiety again, I start to feel fear, irrational fear. I started meditating again and felt like I should neve have stopped.

Can anyone give me some advice on how to get rid of fear and negative emotions, and feel love and happiness again?

Thank you so much

Matthew

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Re: Seeking advice on meditation and unpleasant feelings
« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2015, 09:49:30 PM »
You are right - better never to have stopped. If you are like most people you will spend up to an hour a day on your bodily hygiene - why not spend the same on your mental hygiene? That is what meditation is. You know the answer to your own questions - you would not be here writing them down if you did not!
~oOo~     Tat Tvam Asi     ~oOo~    How will you make the world a better place today?     ~oOo~    Fabricate Nothing     ~oOo~

 

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