Meditation and confidence/self-esteem issues

[Mikeler]

Thank you for the responses.

I am currently in an 8 week mindfulness course based on the material of Jon Kabat-Zinn.

I'm learning to do a body scan and mindfullness of breath. I do a 20 minute CD guided body scan and 30 minutes of mindfullness of breath.

I haven't done Shamata meditation yet but it sounds similar to mindfullness of breath.

Do you think this is enough daily practice to make a difference?

[Dharmic Tui]

I think it's a sound amount of practice.

But don't get caught up in too much or too little.

[Matthew]

Shamatha/Calm is a product of mindfulness of breath meditation, if done right.

[Mikeler]

So basically I'm supposed to be really relaxed after finishing my meditation practice?

That sounds about right for me, I mean it certainly centers/grounds me quite well even if I don't necessarily feel any better.

[Matthew]

Middle way: relaxed and aware/attentive/Mindful

... but "relaxing/calming the body" is in the meditation Suttas instructions repeatedly, and for good reason. Without it there is too much ego effort in the process.

[garyblackhouse]

So basically I'm supposed to be really relaxed after finishing my meditation practice?

Not what is supposed to be in 20 minutes as you begin to practice. What is in the moment you begin to pracitce. What is right now as you read this is what is. Do not expect what will come after your next practice. It will never be like you expected.

That sounds about right for me, I mean it certainly centers/grounds me quite well even if I don't necessarily feel any better.

Ah, there you go, the feelings are still there, but you're observing them differently through practice. This is very good.

[Matthew]

Where to begin in meditation if you are anxious/troubled/incessantly thinking/just not getting it/PSTD/Mental health issues/etc

Sit comfortably: spine erect but comfortable, a sense of being awake and aware.

Breathe in and out naturally: paying attention to your bodily sensations and calming bodily tensions.

Let thoughts be: without following them and without suppressing them.

When you find you have got caught on the "thought-train" return awareness to bodily sensations and calming the body. Do so without guilt.

Remain aware and awake: if you feel sleepy it is often because your body posture has leant forward and your breathing become shallow.

Try and find as much time in the day as you can practically find to undertake this practice and undertake the practice on a daily basis.

[redalert]

Middle way: relaxed and aware/attentive/Mindful

... but "relaxing/calming the body" is in the meditation Suttas instructions repeatedly, and for good reason. Without it there is too much ego effort in the process.

It is however necessary to sit and observe this ego and at times we are faced with some bigggggg sankharas, and they can be difficult to observe. They tend to cause a great deal of tension and suffering in the body. It is important to develope strong determination and face these, this strong determination allows us to observe these big sankharas instead of running away from them. This is how we develope equiminity towards this suffering and while we are equanimous the knots from our past conditioning begin to loosen and unwind. Only then are we truly freed from these sankharas.

Relaxing and calming the body takes much practice, we must sit through misery(ego) as well as pleasure(ego) we don't want to reinforce our old habit pattern of running from pain towards pleasure. We also don't want to torture ourselves, its a delicate practice to find middle ground.

[Mikeler]

Middle way: relaxed and aware/attentive/Mindful

... but "relaxing/calming the body" is in the meditation Suttas instructions repeatedly, and for good reason. Without it there is too much ego effort in the process.

It is however necessary to sit and observe this ego and at times we are faced with some bigggggg sankharas, and they can be difficult to observe. They tend to cause a great deal of tension and suffering in the body. It is important to develope strong determination and face these, this strong determination allows us to observe these big sankharas instead of running away from them. This is how we develope equiminity towards this suffering and while we are equanimous the knots from our past conditioning begin to loosen and unwind. Only then are we truly freed from these sankharas.

Relaxing and calming the body takes much practice, we must sit through misery(ego) as well as pleasure(ego) we don't want to reinforce our old habit pattern of running from pain towards pleasure. We also don't want to torture ourselves, its a delicate practice to find middle ground.

Hmm, this all sounds quite complex. 

All I do is mindful breating followed by a body scan.

[Matthew]

Middle way: relaxed and aware/attentive/Mindful

... but "relaxing/calming the body" is in the meditation Suttas instructions repeatedly, and for good reason. Without it there is too much ego effort in the process.

Hmm, this all sounds quite complex. 

All I do is mindful breating followed by a body scan.

what I wrote is simple, under my name it says 'keep it simple', don't associate my words with others commentary.

[redalert]

Hmm, this all sounds quite complex. 

Its not really, but my apologies if this confused you.
It's just that for me meditation is observing the present moment as it is, not as I would like it to be. We don't want to reinforce the habit of the mind to run from unpleasantness towards the pleasant. This involves sitting through some unpleasantness at times but we are not doing this practice to torture ourselves either. My point was that we don't want to quit when meditation becomes unpleasant and we also don't want to torture ourselves we are looking for the middle way. We each need to find this middle ground for ourselves and at times we will cross from one extreme to the other.

If each time an unpleasant mental formation(sankhara) arises and we develope aversion, we multiply our misery and keep tying new knots. If however we remain equanimous(calm balanced mind) we let the knots unwind naturally and begin to come out of our misery.