Meditation Forum

Vipassana Meditation Forum => Meditation, Practice And The Path => Topic started by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 02:18:04 PM

Title: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 02:18:04 PM
I don't won't to start a sexist discussion. I am just curios, why there is hardly any female presence in this forum? not just as members but also taking part in the discussions.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on December 07, 2007, 02:53:31 PM
Tara

It is an interesting point I have also noticed. At the moment the ratio of members is 3.3 men to each woman however this is more balanced than when we first opened out doors. It was 4.5 or 5 to 1 for the first month or so. Perhaps it will continue to balance out more as more members join the forum.

I have wondered if this reflects an inbalance between male and female in the population of meditators but I don't think so - certainly not all of it, if any. Part of it may be that more men use the internet and part of it may be that women are more used to confiding in personal friends whereas men quite like the anonymity a forum such as this offers.

Mostly however I think it is just down to "early days" and the numbers will level out as time goes by.

In the meantime - what with me being young(ish), free and single - I heartily encourage you to get all your female friends from all over the world to join whether they meditate or not ;)

In the Dhamma(ish),

Matthew
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 03:17:46 PM


I have wondered if this reflects an inbalance between male and female in the population of meditators

I have wondered that too that is why I asked


In the meantime - what with me being young(ish), free and single - I heartily encourage you to get all your female friends from all over the world to join whether they meditate or not ;)


Trust me if I introduce my single girl friends it will become more of a dating forum then Vipassana one.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: mettajoey on December 07, 2007, 03:18:28 PM


In the meantime - what with me being young(ish), free and single - I heartily encourage you to get all your female friends from all over the world to join whether they meditate or not ;)



Matthew

You just had to throw that in there didn't ya!  ;D
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: mettajoey on December 07, 2007, 03:22:06 PM

Trust me if I introduce my single girl friends it will become more of a dating forum then Vipassana one.


Damn, and you guys are way over there in England... :D
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 03:35:18 PM
Silentflute, Don't tell me that you too young(ish), free and single.
Am I the only one in this forum who is not young(ish), free and single.
I will probably start a Vipassana dating agency I have lots of single friends to fill the book.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on December 07, 2007, 03:48:06 PM
Time for a "sister" site .... hotvipassanadates.com ??
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 04:03:24 PM
Right I will get on with it, thank you TIB for the inspiration. Should I put your name down as my first member ?! I will charge you some metta for the membership.
Silentflute let me know

At the moment the ratio of members is 3.3 men to each woman

I have studied science for over 15 years and still find statistics funny, 3.3:1 would that be a third of a man? Actually if I got it right in the top 10 posters the ratio is 9:1.
It doesn't bother me I am just wondering because in all the practises I have followed except for Paganism the male presence is always the dominant one.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: mettajoey on December 07, 2007, 04:15:46 PM
Please sign me up!  :)  I'm sending metta now...

I wonder if TIB has a point about the internet, though.  I asked the question at my retreat and there are typically more women per retreat than men.  But not by a large margin, maybe under 10%.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on December 07, 2007, 06:29:01 PM
I have studied science for over 15 years and still find statistics funny, 3.3:1 would that be a third of a man? Actually if I got it right in the top 10 posters the ratio is 9:1.

Yes .. well ... statistics are basically mathematical lies so that is no surprise ... and 9:1 is because most of the female membership are avowed lurkers ... they are behind the scenes reading what gets written but not posting, which to be clear is not a criticism - anyone is very welcome to do that.

Right I will get on with it, thank you TIB for the inspiration. Should I put your name down as my first member ?! I will charge you some metta for the membership.

Wow. You steal my idea and want to charge me metta? You're one hell of a business woman.

;)

Matthew

ps YES! lol
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 08:12:07 PM

Wow. You steal my idea and want to charge me metta? You're one hell of a business woman.

It is not about who got the idea first; it is about who acts on it first.
beside if I am to convince my single girl friends to join I have got to make sure it is a safe environment.



9:1 is because most of the female membership are avowed lurkers ... they are behind the scenes reading what gets written but not posting, which to be clear is not a criticism - anyone is very welcome to do that.


I wasn't criticising either, I was just making an observation
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on December 07, 2007, 08:59:42 PM
Dear Tara

1. I was joking. Sorry - sometimes people seem to find it hard to know when I am.

2 I didn't think you were criticising. As I mentioned, I had observed the same thing - I was thinking about the issue yesterday as it happens.

:) Matthew
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 09:35:17 PM
Dear Tara

1. I was joking. Sorry - sometimes people seem to find it hard to know when I am.
Oh, never crossed my mind you were serious
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 07, 2007, 09:37:20 PM
sorry Matthew I meant I know you weren't serious in your reply to my post not in general.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on December 07, 2007, 11:26:53 PM
:)
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Paul on December 08, 2007, 05:42:41 AM
Am I the only one in this forum who is not young(ish), free and single.
I will probably start a Vipassana dating agency I have lots of single friends to fill the book.

You're not the only one Tara  :)

I note that this topic must have broken the record for the amount of postings received in one day....definitely time for the sister site  ;)
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 08, 2007, 12:10:51 PM
Thank you Paul for the support  :) :) :)

I started this topic because I was reading a book about the place of women in religions.
From my own experience when it comes to finding the truth the male presence is almost always the dominant one. in fact in some practises men hold the knowledge and guard the gate to the truth.
then I remembered I have hardly seen female posts so I asked.
I would love to hear from the sisters in the forum
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on December 15, 2007, 01:47:40 PM
I made two observations:

1) For females the meditation courses in Germany are booked up for many months, but for males it's quite easy to get a place for the next course ... so there are definitely more female meditators who try to do a Vipassana-course.

2) In my opinion we males are more top-heavy (... is this the right expression for: "we are thinking too much" ...?), whereas women have an easy access to intuition that solves a lot of problems for you. We men have to discuss it and discuss it again ...

Metta to you, Stefan
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on December 15, 2007, 07:50:22 PM
you are probably right Stefan. Also may be us women worry more than men about our thoughts being judged.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on February 16, 2008, 10:25:20 PM
Guys I am raising this question again. WHERE ARE THE WOMEN IN THIS FORUM?
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on February 17, 2008, 06:41:26 PM
We can't tell! We're also wondering why they are hiding ...  ;D
but then, I think the male-female-thing is only outwards ... the coat for this life.
So: we are here ... in disguise!
 8) Metta, Stefanie
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on February 28, 2008, 04:15:20 PM
Hi Stefanie,

I had no idea you are able to shape shift Stefan.
Till I experience the no-self thingy,
I can only believe I am actually a woman.
And a woman for a reason.
So at this stage of my development I don’t buy into the coat idea.

Metta to you Stefan
Metta to you Stefanie
 :D
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on February 29, 2008, 02:16:32 PM

maybe for you women there's no need to think that way (I read your Tara-story ...). We males are educated to be, you know, males. The biggest Gorilla in the bush. We loose everything that's soft and sensitive when we try to fit into that role. So for me it was also a sort of therapeutic thing to play with the thought of being a female in the next life (or in past lives).

And as a biologist I should add: isn't it interesting that you females have two female chromosomes (XX), but we males have a male AND a female chromosome (XY)?

Metta, Stefan (I think ...)
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: spiceant on March 16, 2008, 11:48:20 PM
Us males are defective females as evidenced by our infertility, inferior nurturing abilities and a defective chromosome (The Y Chrommy). Virgin births are possible and have happened rarely (and there isnt much miracelous about it, doesnt take much of a genetic accident to "accidently" clone a women), so we males wouldn't be necessary if all our substance and sex abuse hadn't degenerated us as badly as it did and made our women as infertile as they are that we hardly have any virgin pregnancies anymore.

Furthermore the male population is a bit more stupid as evidenced by our often violent (and as anger expressing fearfull) nature which is often in a perverse parody of truth mistaken for some sort of godly quality. No need to worry about that though, everything is temperory anyway.
Oh you female how i would envy you :-*. Praise the woman, praise the woman, :-* my god my god. Save me save me save me. All fall on their knees for the great women and praise her names a 3 x 108 times, let us burn incense that she may be with us in dire times and repeat name forever that we should not have to lift a single brain cell and never have to do anything for our own enlightenment. (Ofcourse, all of us will do everything for our own enlightenmentments respectively)

Lets not get carried away by the X & Y religion of modern science. 'The world' is divise enough without use of words alone no need to add to it with the abuse of words.

:) this message was posted at the risk of uttering truth. :)
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on March 17, 2008, 07:22:31 PM
hei spiceant ...

... no I don't get it. What are you up to?

Metta, Stefan
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: spiceant on March 18, 2008, 10:25:49 AM
Im not up to anything in particular. Im suggesting women are more complete and in general superior. (And i neither do or not suggest we take some change behaviour based on that.) One more detail about women, the have a bit longer lifespan (as they have an additional pathway to eliminate poisons with their monthly cycle)

There is one other issue i touched upon with the last sentence in my last reply namely that of the so called feminine and masculine  (that of feeling/intuition and rationality). The rationality being effable in words and only effective if accompanied by feeling or intuition, the feminine.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on March 18, 2008, 02:22:38 PM
ok now I understand. But I'm not a friend of calling lifeforms, people or sexes "superior" or "inferior".
I am quoting myself: is the yin more yinyang than the yang (or vice versa)?

Metta, Stefan
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on March 18, 2008, 05:48:33 PM
There is no "yin"",
If there is no "yang".
Nor are there "women",
If there are no "men"
All arise and all depend,
Upon each other to the end.

:)
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: spiceant on March 18, 2008, 06:35:32 PM
does yinyang apply to sexes?

Why do you have a problem with calling superior/inferior? We'r all born inequal or else we'd be identical. The point is not to think of it or be bothered by it but do the best you can regardless.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on March 19, 2008, 05:52:47 PM
Wonderful poem, Matthew!  :)

In Germany we remember one of these strange terrible guys (had a moustache), who made a big fuzz about superior/ inferior, and six million people got killed ....

"superior-inferior" is totally different to "inequal".
Calling us inequal means observing what really exists. True, we are all inequal.
But calling someone superior or inferior means judging, and that leads to the creation of sankharas in the end.

Yes, YinYang also applies to sexes. Archetypical symbolism.

Metta, Stefan
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: spiceant on March 19, 2008, 07:26:12 PM
Hello Stefan,

I take a little offense to this yin yang teaching. I find it builds on the late (last 10.000-6000 years) teaching of evil and good (that there is evil as a real something and good as an equally real something), light/dark and so forth. But there is no dark, only light. There is no dark, only the relative absence of a certain amount of light. there is no cold, only the lack of a certain amount of heat. So also there is no evil, only good (and there is always atleast a little bit of good everywhere). The analogy of female/male feminine/masculine was used because it served well because of what it culturally stood for. Namely the female standing for feeling and male for rational. but it is outdated. (And also i believe, yin/yang & Archetypical symbolism is not a bhudda/dhamma teaching?)

I find what you say is contradictory or paradoxial and also that you are getting a few things confused. By superior/inferior is different from inequal you are stating something like hot are both cold are inequal to different. sup/inferior hot/cold are both functions of a concept and inequality/difference signifies. By sup/inferior i mean complete/defective healthy/sick. I am go way more into this if you request, but i want to say other things first.

I find your Adolf Hitler analogy offensive, thats like saying Jesus is a criminal because of the christian crusades or that the (current) Dalai Lama is a criminal because a few tibetians are being bad. I (get the idea) in the same way you insinuate that this superior/inferior idea i am expressing is evil because a disturbed somebody had used that idea to do horrific things. That problem was not the idea itself but what was done with it. The same thing that is being done with rat poison, being 99% food and 1% poison oor lets examplify the bible, 99% true but 1% lethal assumption or lets say bhuddism, 99% true but 1% messes it up for most.

I mean to examplify that there is no point in discussing these kind of things, because they don't have any good application/utility and just a way to divide, conquer, traumatize etc... (as your holocaust analogy examplifies) There is no point in discussing it for many reasons. 1 Because it has been rigged / boobytrapped to be divisive/confusing/darkening/evil in our society and 2 it just isnt usefull for anything. None Can do any practical good with it. It goes back to an idea i see expressed in the new testament: Your only going to get to 'heaven' as simple as a young child. (Matthew 18:3) Young children don't get into elaborate arguments. Their life radiates all the teaching anyone ever need to know.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Stefan on March 19, 2008, 07:34:33 PM
Hei Spiceant,

no offence ment really!

With Metta & a warm smile, Stefan

Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: spiceant on March 19, 2008, 08:48:37 PM
i exegerated a bit perhaps. I find that of me "taking offense" is better described as "seeing something absurd"

hugs,
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Green Tara on April 05, 2008, 07:46:33 PM
My life has changed a lot recently and I hardly have any free time,
but I had to come back and post, just in case, people might think you guys are doing something to drive women away from this forum.  ;)
No seriously, I am really baffled, still curious, and don’t have a clue to why female members don’t post. Probably they know something I don’t. if that is the case, please please tell me, (that was pleading to the female members here).
The thing is I have seen some of the members posting on other Vipassana forum, so why not this one. ???
I will keep on asking till I get the answer.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on May 02, 2008, 05:13:28 PM
2.5 to 1 now ... things are slowly moving in the right direction :)

In the Dhamma,

Matthew
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Flipasso on May 02, 2008, 11:00:19 PM
when there are 51% of women in this forum I will consider the forum a representative sample of the world population...    Statistics...

happiness@
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on May 03, 2008, 09:48:23 AM
Maybe more men use the internet for revealing themselves than women due to social expectation. 51 per cent may not be fair.

;)
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: ivana on November 21, 2010, 05:43:17 PM
I hop I am at meditation forum site so it does not matter if I am a woman or a man or if mostly man  post something. By the way I am a woman and do not worry first of all I am a human being.  :D
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: Matthew on November 21, 2010, 06:02:06 PM
There are many more guys on the site than women. This we know. Does it matter? Is there a reason?

Those things seem not important. The qualities of the community are what matter. Recently the site membership has grown and bit by bit people get to know one another. The quality of discussion here is much improved recently due to several factors.
Title: Re: Women in this forum !!
Post by: maybeiam on November 22, 2010, 03:34:33 AM
interesting
 :)